If you had asked the eighteen year old version of me what my life would be like right now I'm pretty sure that it would be far from the way it's turned out. The eighteen year old me would have seen myself married by graduation, probably expecting my first baby and happily living in an apartment in Rexburg and waiting for my husband to finish his last year of college.
Well the current version of my is now gaging at the thought! Not that I wouldn't have been happy that way, cause I do want to get married and have children, I'm just grateful for the opportunity I have to delay those things a little bit.
So I'm leaving Rexburg, and no, I'm not married, engaged, or in anyway attached to any male. And I'm excited.
Why you may ask? I'll give you a list of things that I have the opportunity to do because I'm single, that I may have had to give up otherwise.
1. I am moving by MYSELF to Mesa, AZ for at least 3 mos.
I'm headed down there to student teach, and then we'll see what happens after that. I'm super excited too. It's going to be a completely new experience. I'm extremely happy for this opportunity. I love Idaho, but at the same time, I'm only lived in Idaho. I'll probably live down there for the 3 mos. and come back up after I'm done and decide that it's way to hot down there, and that I need to have all four seasons, but I want to see what it's like anyway. A lot of people are happy just accepting life as it is. They like it the way it's always been and they're willing to let it remain that way. I'm noticing more and more, that's not my way. When I'm content with my current circumstances, I'm still always wondering what if? So I'm moving to Mesa, just so when and if I do decide to live in IF, I'll be happy because I won't just be choosing it out of convience. I will know what life is like outside of Idaho, and I'll be able to judge what I'm doing a little bit better.
2. I'm making decisions on my own.
I'm not having to depend on someone else at least at the moment. I get to decide where I'm moving and what I'm doing with my life. At least at the moment, my life isn't based off of my husband's work or schooling. Going back to the content thing, had I got married by now, it would have probably been pretty easy to just say, yeah, wherever we need to go that's fine, I don't care. Well now I have to care!! Otherwise I may end up hanging out in my parent's basement until I do figure things out.
3. Hopefully, I'll get to serve a mission after I student teach and graduate
This is the plan, however, I've got to earn some money to pay for it before I can go. And since I thik that I'll be leaving in the fall a lot could happen between now and then. Hopefully if I do though, I'll get to experience a new culture I hope and just gain greater trust and faith.
4. Trips with the girls!
I'm hoping to go on a trip back east with some old roommates/friends. If I was married, would I have the time/money to do this? NO! And very possibly, they wouldn't even have been in my life had I not still been in a single's ward. I'm still making memories that I'll get to keep even after I get married.
5. I'm deciding who I really want to marry. ... or the type of person anyway, and becoming like them.
We had a talk in church a week or so ago, where they talked about being the type of person you want to marry. So very true. I'm going to work to become the type of person my future husband would like, and I'll hope he's working on himself for me.
6. I have the rest of eternity to be married. Just a few short years to be single.
I'm going to live life to the fullest and enjoy it as it happens. I can't wait to be married, but I am also having the best time of my life right now being just me. I'm doing stuff that I want to do and making choices and decisions that currently affect only me. (Ultimately they'll probably effect my future family when my choices lead me to Mr. Right, but you know what I mean)
7. I'm going to be more ready as a wife and a mother when I do meet Mr. Right.
I'm glad I'm going to have more growing experiences before I get married. I guess you could say more life experience. I'm going to be more independent and I'm going to know a lot more about running a household and raising kids by then to, rather than just kinda learning as I go.
8. I'm developing friendships that I hope will last into married life. I admit that things will change after I'm married, however, I don't want to just fall off the face of the earth because I'm married and we've become our own little "unit." I want to keep the people that are important to me a part of my life.
9. I will have at least a Bachelor's Degree to fall back on if something were to happen to my future husband. I have always been scared that I wouldn't finish my degree for some reason and that I'd have to go back to school. I'm just glad to know that I will have a way to support myself.
10. I'll have the opportunity to save up some money hopefully before I get married to prepare for the future. Getting married and having kids and buying houses are all expensive. It'll be nice to have some money to go towards that.
So yeah, this is an exciting time in my life. I love my family, and I'd love to add a son- in- law to it, but this is my time to do what's good for me and to experience life for myself. I will have the opportunity for a husband and kids, but I'm not going to waste my life waiting for him to show up. I'm happy with the way it's working out so far and I know that when the time is right, Heavenly Father will send an amazing guy into my life. (Until that time, I may have to suffer through a thousand dates and singles activities, but these will just make the right guy seem all that much more worth it.)
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
The end of an Era
So I've been doing a lot of thinking lately... amazing I know!!! And yet, again as I was getting ready for bed, a bunch of these thoughts started to come to the surface and swirl around in my brain again, and I know that I won't be sleeping until they come out in writing.
--- I'm leaving Rexburg. I know it's true, but in a lot of ways this thought still isn't really concrete. And it probably won't be until I stick the final item in my car in December and wander back into my apartment to see if all my stuff is really gone. And I'll stand there, probably turn around and survey the room and it probably still won't seem real.
See I've gotten really good at the moving thing. I've moved every three months basically since April 2008. So loading my stuff up in my car with plans to move isn't that big of deal. I've become a pro at packing now. ;D And because of that I don't know if it'll really hit me that this is the "end of the road," that I've gone as far as I can at BYU-I. It's kinda surreal, ya know, much harder than graduating high school ever was. The end of high school I knew would be a big change, but I still had several people I knew that were headed off on the same road I was. But this time, I'm leaving, and the friends that I've made are either staying or they left before me.
But unlike a lot of my friends, (some are in search of new freshman that they can marry so they can stay in Rexburg another 4-5 yrs) I am actually ready to move on. I've seen a lot of changes take place on campus and I've made a lot of fond memories, but I think that I am finally to the point where the excitement of college isn't so much anymore. I realized the other day that I can easily find my way around the library (something I never thought would happen as a freshman) and I can even go through the Snow without getting lost. I'm also attempting to have a bedtime of 11pm, and I wake up by like 6:30am (well with the exception of Thanksgiving Vacation, that's kinda thrown me a lot), completely against my nature, ask any of my former roommates. But now, here I am in my final semester, and I have classes by 8am everyday and I'm no longer complaining about them. I think I'm turning into an adult, scary!!!. And my goals now aren't about upcoming semesters anymore I'm actually trying to plan my life after college....
--- I'm leaving Rexburg. I know it's true, but in a lot of ways this thought still isn't really concrete. And it probably won't be until I stick the final item in my car in December and wander back into my apartment to see if all my stuff is really gone. And I'll stand there, probably turn around and survey the room and it probably still won't seem real.
See I've gotten really good at the moving thing. I've moved every three months basically since April 2008. So loading my stuff up in my car with plans to move isn't that big of deal. I've become a pro at packing now. ;D And because of that I don't know if it'll really hit me that this is the "end of the road," that I've gone as far as I can at BYU-I. It's kinda surreal, ya know, much harder than graduating high school ever was. The end of high school I knew would be a big change, but I still had several people I knew that were headed off on the same road I was. But this time, I'm leaving, and the friends that I've made are either staying or they left before me.
But unlike a lot of my friends, (some are in search of new freshman that they can marry so they can stay in Rexburg another 4-5 yrs) I am actually ready to move on. I've seen a lot of changes take place on campus and I've made a lot of fond memories, but I think that I am finally to the point where the excitement of college isn't so much anymore. I realized the other day that I can easily find my way around the library (something I never thought would happen as a freshman) and I can even go through the Snow without getting lost. I'm also attempting to have a bedtime of 11pm, and I wake up by like 6:30am (well with the exception of Thanksgiving Vacation, that's kinda thrown me a lot), completely against my nature, ask any of my former roommates. But now, here I am in my final semester, and I have classes by 8am everyday and I'm no longer complaining about them. I think I'm turning into an adult, scary!!!. And my goals now aren't about upcoming semesters anymore I'm actually trying to plan my life after college....
Friday, November 6, 2009
Ward Halloween Party
Here's a photo of Jamie, Ashley, Laura and I, almost all of our apartment, with the exception of Elizabeth who was on a date with her fiance that night, at a ward Halloween Party. This is basically four versions of Pippi Longstocking brought to you via the closets of Apartment #110. We won most creative costume.
These girls are my gorgous neighbors: they won best apartment theme.
In addition to our costume contest our ward went on a "hayride" on the flat bed of a semi with haybales. Here's some of my roommates and some girls from my ward.
Some of the scenery we saw. Can I say that I still think that Idaho is the prettiest place on the planet.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Moving Forward..
So I'm hoping that this title will be suffient to say several things.
#1 I moved into my LAST apartment at BYUI.
#2 I am realizing that everything changes, but at the same time, change can be good... so far... we'll see what I have to say after graduation.
#3 I got to go on a hike this morning!!!
So I'm going to try to cover all of these topics as quickly and simply as possible, but odds are it may get lengthy.
Moving in. Well I knew it would be to good to be true, last semester when I moved into my complex I basically walked into the lounge waited for the girl in front of me got my key and was in and out of check in less than 10 mins.
This semester, however, of course, I had to have the line experience, what would the move in week be without waiting in at least one very long line?
But I'm in my apartment on the 1st floor and sadly like any apartment it has "the good, the bad, and the ugly" parts about it. Thankfully at the moment I think there are still more good things, but only time will tell.
The Good:
*Less of a walk to unload and move in, and to get home, no third floor walk up this semester.
*New carpet!
*New ward- With an amazing Bishopric- School hasn't even started and I've already had a get to know you interview with a member of the Bishopric.
*Only 5 roommates total!!!! For me this is amazing! I've had 6 roommates every semester I've been in Rexburg. Making the grand total of roommates from 9 semester of college and 10 living in Rexburg and including this semester, but not counting my family ... drum roll please.... 38 roommates. That is 38 different cleaning styles (besides my own) , 38 different sets of emotions, etc. 38! That's a lot!
But so far they see to be some awesome girls. 3 of them are RMs and each of them served foreign so I think that our apartment will definately be experiencing some culture shock and a variety of languages. My roommates served in Hamburg, Germany; Somewhere in Romania, and somewhere in Argentina. Not to mention my roommates are from all over the U.S. originally. California, Colorado, North Carolina, Nevada, and Idaho.
*Seeing old friends- I've already run into a few friends, and I'm not trying to discount anyone, but I'm especially glad to see my old friend Belen. She was my FHE sister for 2 semesters way back in my sophomore year of college- and then she left on a mission, and is finally back in Rexburg, just in time for me to bid my farewells to the 'Burg.
And as luck would have it, we're in the same complex again, but this time not at Riviera.
And what's awesome is that seriously it's just like old times. Both of our lives have moved on significantly, but we've had fun remembering some of the craziness of our Riviera days. And some of our crazy friends and roommates that we made there. And it was so great to hear what's been going on over the last 2 years. I'm so glad she's back!
The Bad-
*Well it is my last semester in Rexburg.
*Tiny fridge- very glad there's only 5 of use sharing.
*I bought less than half of my textbooks on campus. And it still cost me over $250! In addition to the other $200 I'd already spent online. It's really annoying when a laminated folded piece of paper with information on it called a smart card costs $4 each, and I needed at least 4.
The Ugly-
*I am back on the bottom floor and my bedroom wall is shared with the bathrooms. So anyone that decides to take a shower, in my apartment or either of the apartments above me I get to hear, thank you, indoor plumbing! ... Is there a way the water could be shut off at 12:30... or better yet, when I go to bed. :D
*My neighbors upstairs decided to move all of their furniture at like 12:30 last night. And believe it or not, I had actually been asleep for about an hour. .. Note the word had! It seriously sounded like we were being attacked! And if that continues, the dear girls in Apartment 210 may get an early morning visit from some very unhappy lack of sleepers!
#2- Changes
*What happened to Walmart. So the "Ammon" Walmart has been in the process of remolding all summer, and it was getting annoying to find anything so I procrastinated picking some things up thinking I could find them easily here in Rexburg. Well, sadly good ol' Wally world here's remodeled too. It looks, good, but it would be a pain to find anything just with remodeling and rearranging, but now, you also have to add like 13,000ish college students all needing to shop at Walmart.
*There's been a ton of changes on campus thanks to a lot of construction. The outside of the new auditorium is almost done... which is crazy considering the walls were still basically open when I left. And evidently there is now a real place to eat on campus beyond the make shift place in the old bookstore. It was so weird to eat at a table that was placed where gym clothes or textbooks used to be.
#3 So my roommates and I decided to go on a hike this morning. But thanks to early call ins to work and just general lack of sleep, only 2 of us, Jamie and I, actually headed out from our apartment.
But we were also joined by Belen and her roommates, Ivon, and Heidi. As well as an old friend from Riviera, Mariah.
We drove about 45 minutes North of Rexburg to the Harriman State Park, of Idaho, evidently there's a Harriman State Park in New York too.
But we went on a 4.5 mile hike around Silver Lake. And it was so pretty! And it was just fantastic to be able to go out and enjoy God's greatest creations!
And since we start classes tomorrow it was an easy enough hike, that we weren't going to kill ourselves physically and then be in pain throughout our classes tomorrow. - And I think that in general the steep parts of that trail had less of a slope than the walk up the hill to campus from my apartment.
But just a fabulous day with friends that will hopefully be a fabulous new semester.
And sadly the library is closing and our internet is still having the beginning of semester troubles so I can't upload a million pictures yet. But they will be coming soon.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
A case of skittles.... :o)
So I'm going to have to apologize ahead of time, I think this blog has kinda turned into a sounding board and a way for me to laugh and to complain and just generally talk about some typical blog topics and some more random rants and raves about the "pleasures" of life. So today... well tonight, or this morning depending on what you define a half hour after midnight as.... anyway... I'm going to complain about skittles.
And no I am not talking about the colorful little candies that are like M&Ms but are fruity and not chocolatey. No this is another type of skittles I am refering to... one that is actually a code name that I had a guy friend dub anything that may in any way, shape or form be associated with girly problems or products ; D.
Ok any guys that may be reading this- now that you know that my rants are about the taboo topic of SKITTLES, now would be a perfectly safe time to move your mouse up to the little red X in the corner that will close the window and you can save yourself from anything that may make you feel a little bit awkward. So I will give you the time to head to the emergency exit before I begin.
So now that it's just us girls here, let me begin:
And mind you that what is stated in here is completely confidential :0) and basically all are side effects of skittles and will probably sizzle out around the end of our favorite time of the month.
So yes right now I am suffering from a case of skittles... that dreaded time of the month that always starts moving in and driving you nuts for not just the time it's actually visiting, but also sends a few warnings that it's coming a week or two in advance. Come on we're all girls here, you know what I'm talking about.
But what annoys me most is not the general annoyance of it all, but actually one of it's side effects. For some reason, my interest level in any and all guys increases, whether I really like the guy or not!
I am actually very happy to be single right now. I love my life and I am very glad that I have made it this far single. And yes, I do want to be married sooner rather than later, but I am perfectly fine enjoying the few years that I am single. I have the rest of eternity to spend with that special someone, so if I can have some fun, and make some random friends on the way I will still be eternally happy whether I meet that guy now or in a couple of years. This is what I typically feel. I enjoy flirting and hanging out and dating, but none of the guys that's I've dated have been "the one."
But at this time in the month, I almost feel a desperate need to attach myself to any XY wandering by... or I gain an upped interest in my male friends to go beyond our current relationship status as friends.
I hate to say it, but I almost feel like at that Skittle time of the month I turn into one of THOSE girls... you know they type that fall in love with everything with testostorone. And that flirt with each and every single guy and that will stalk them until the guy takes them out.
I've lived with those girls, I've watched each and everyone of those girls get married, but I don't want to be one of those girls!
I want the guy I truely fall in love with to be the one who likes me because I haven't been stalking him all over campus. :o) And because he just likes talking to me and doing stuff with me and kissing me...
But I personally feel like a dork, when hormones start telling me that I'm interested in a guy just because nature has set up humans to be attracted to each other, and sadly, just like any other mammal we all tend to be more attracted to the opposite sex at the time of the month that we are most likely going to be able to fertilize our eggs.
I will probably appreciate this more when I am in fact married and preparing to have children, but right now all it is is confusing!
How can you decide if you genuinely like a guy if nature decides to up the ante for like 2 or so weeks out of the month and causes you to become gaga, not just attracted, but gaga, everytime you see a button up shirt, or curly hair, or blue eyes, or dimples, or just have a good conversation, or remember a fond memory... Why? Why is it as girls we are so easily able to crumble and melt at these and other things. I know at least for me that I actually begin to gag when I realized that I'm flipping out over a shirt, or a belt buckle... I think that may be proof I have a thing for the farm/country boy type. But as girls we end up observing anything and when your hormonal you have an increased liklihood I guess to over analyze and overreact to things that really aren't significant at all.
But the sad thing is that I know in like a week or so it will all fad and those guys will return to being my friends. And I will no longer be checking them out on potential fatherhood characteristics.
Okay, so yeah this totally turned into a rambling. But at the moment I guess it was either get into words my thoughts about my increased interest in certain people, or I would probably started to click through their pictures on facebook.... and admit it... you've been there.....
And no I am not talking about the colorful little candies that are like M&Ms but are fruity and not chocolatey. No this is another type of skittles I am refering to... one that is actually a code name that I had a guy friend dub anything that may in any way, shape or form be associated with girly problems or products ; D.
Ok any guys that may be reading this- now that you know that my rants are about the taboo topic of SKITTLES, now would be a perfectly safe time to move your mouse up to the little red X in the corner that will close the window and you can save yourself from anything that may make you feel a little bit awkward. So I will give you the time to head to the emergency exit before I begin.
So now that it's just us girls here, let me begin:
And mind you that what is stated in here is completely confidential :0) and basically all are side effects of skittles and will probably sizzle out around the end of our favorite time of the month.
So yes right now I am suffering from a case of skittles... that dreaded time of the month that always starts moving in and driving you nuts for not just the time it's actually visiting, but also sends a few warnings that it's coming a week or two in advance. Come on we're all girls here, you know what I'm talking about.
But what annoys me most is not the general annoyance of it all, but actually one of it's side effects. For some reason, my interest level in any and all guys increases, whether I really like the guy or not!
I am actually very happy to be single right now. I love my life and I am very glad that I have made it this far single. And yes, I do want to be married sooner rather than later, but I am perfectly fine enjoying the few years that I am single. I have the rest of eternity to spend with that special someone, so if I can have some fun, and make some random friends on the way I will still be eternally happy whether I meet that guy now or in a couple of years. This is what I typically feel. I enjoy flirting and hanging out and dating, but none of the guys that's I've dated have been "the one."
But at this time in the month, I almost feel a desperate need to attach myself to any XY wandering by... or I gain an upped interest in my male friends to go beyond our current relationship status as friends.
I hate to say it, but I almost feel like at that Skittle time of the month I turn into one of THOSE girls... you know they type that fall in love with everything with testostorone. And that flirt with each and every single guy and that will stalk them until the guy takes them out.
I've lived with those girls, I've watched each and everyone of those girls get married, but I don't want to be one of those girls!
I want the guy I truely fall in love with to be the one who likes me because I haven't been stalking him all over campus. :o) And because he just likes talking to me and doing stuff with me and kissing me...
But I personally feel like a dork, when hormones start telling me that I'm interested in a guy just because nature has set up humans to be attracted to each other, and sadly, just like any other mammal we all tend to be more attracted to the opposite sex at the time of the month that we are most likely going to be able to fertilize our eggs.
I will probably appreciate this more when I am in fact married and preparing to have children, but right now all it is is confusing!
How can you decide if you genuinely like a guy if nature decides to up the ante for like 2 or so weeks out of the month and causes you to become gaga, not just attracted, but gaga, everytime you see a button up shirt, or curly hair, or blue eyes, or dimples, or just have a good conversation, or remember a fond memory... Why? Why is it as girls we are so easily able to crumble and melt at these and other things. I know at least for me that I actually begin to gag when I realized that I'm flipping out over a shirt, or a belt buckle... I think that may be proof I have a thing for the farm/country boy type. But as girls we end up observing anything and when your hormonal you have an increased liklihood I guess to over analyze and overreact to things that really aren't significant at all.
But the sad thing is that I know in like a week or so it will all fad and those guys will return to being my friends. And I will no longer be checking them out on potential fatherhood characteristics.
Okay, so yeah this totally turned into a rambling. But at the moment I guess it was either get into words my thoughts about my increased interest in certain people, or I would probably started to click through their pictures on facebook.... and admit it... you've been there.....
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
The End Of Innocence...
So I have to laugh... I work with kids, and they're just so innocent. And they can say the funniest things. I can't remember half of them, but if you ever have a bad day just stand near a child and you will find something to laugh about.
One day I asked my client how she got her hair so cute and curly and she starts talking about
something completely off topic about what her brother did.
And so we have music time at work, and so we sing songs like I'm a nut... traditionally not the girls camp version, but it depends on if we have people at work that remember the non camp version. But you can also tell that a couple of the little girls mothers are camp leaders cause they are singing the girls camp version :D
We also sing Mary had a little lamb, Do your Ears Hang Low, a song about a pirate ship etc.
Well there's nothing funnier than when you walk away and you have one of these children songs stuck in your own head than to hear to the same tune as the one stuck in your head, such as Mary had a Little Lamb, to hear a little girl start to sing "Mary had a little Jam, whose's lease was white with snow... or something about as random.
Or another client who'd be sitting there writing and then all of a sudden you hear "I went down, down, down to that burning ring of fire..." Coming out of the mouth of a six year old boy. It's hilarious!
Or the fact that you can peg what kind of personalities these kids have now at 3 to 7 yrs old. We have a drama queen and a social butterfly, and one's that the born mother that makes sure that all of the kids are okay, especially if one gets a boo boo.
And then there are the crushes of 5 yr olds. It's so blately obvious. Whenever one walks into the room where the other one is they instantly move towards them. But unfortunately there's another girl at our center that has a crush on the guy too, but he likes the other girl, and well you can see the daggers flying... and they're only 5!
And one day I asked the little girl if she had a crush on the boy after she says something about him walking past the door of the room, and she blushes, so totally cute, and she starts to smile, and sweetly and I'm sure you know the -I swear I'm telling the truth voice--- she says "NO!"
And about 5 seconds later, the boy comes into the room and asks her to play. And she beams! And I think, yeah girl, you don't like him at all. And sadly as girls we never change, we still blush and act innocent and swear that "no way we wouldn't like him", but secretly cheer everytime we're near the guy.
And then there's the kids who you tell them not to do something, but you can tell they still want to do it anyway. So they look at you, and they back up into whatever they wanted, or they wait until you look away and then they make a quick move for something. Thinking that you're going to forget that you just told them no or that if they still keep eyecontact with you that you won't see what they're doing.
And they're just so innocent I have to laugh. And I know someday they're going to be looking at little kids themselves going, oh why can't life be like that for me now.
It's memories like these that keep me coming back to TLC.
It's strange that tomorrow is the last day of my 6th summer working for TLC. ... which basically means that I started there originally in June 2004.
But I have a lot of fond memories.
Like my first client ever, a month or so into the summer we worked on spelling his name. So I just started repeating it to him and having him say it after me, kinda sing-songy and by the end of the day he had totally memorized it. We were still working on the rest of the letters of the alphabet, but he completely knew the letters in his name.
Or still that same summer, I had a client that seemed perfectly fine one day, until we were walking into the restroom for him to do the obvious so that we could go on community, and then all of a sudden, puke explodes out of his mouth, thankfully, after we had reached the tiled floor of the bathroom. And it takes me a couple of seconds to process what's just happened, and then unlike what I figured my initial response would be ( like throwing up myself) I just send the kid to a toilet and tell him to stay there. I get someone to help my client up to the couch and then I start in on cleaning up the up chuck.
Okay, don't ask why but I for some reason another of my favorite memories involves another case of upchuck.
So we were driving up to the Splash Park for community a year or so ago, and we are like between Ucon and Rigby and I'm driving a very crowded 15 passenger van, and all of a sudden I hear a gagging sound. And an "Uh-oh." And a yell for a garbage bag or something. Which of course we didn't have. So the child's tech grabbed the next best thing. The kids backpack complete with towel... And so they are also yelling for us to pull over so the kid can get out and walk and puke again outside if needed. And low and behold it's right by the County Line Road exit. That actually has a canal running right off a parking lot next to the road. Talk about good timing. So they get the kid out and he breathes some fresh air and someone else grabs his backpack and heads down to the canal where they commence to wash out the backpack and towel. And inside we find a green changing pad and stick it on the kids seat and we call for another van to meet us at the Splash park in Rexburg and take the kid back. And once we get to Rexburg I head over to my apartment to get some cleaning supplies to sanitize the seat and try to make it somewhat breathable in the van for the ride back. --- There's not a whole lot of airflow in those big vans.
And then there's this year's trip to the Splash Park.
Well this time I was driving the big white 15 passenger van, we have another mini van with kids behind us and a car with techs driving behind the vans, and a couple of cars with IBI therapists and their clients. And we're in this caravan of sorts because the company likes us to stick together incause someone breaks down on the longer trip to Rexburg.
Well we have an adorable little girl that's one of our clients that gets grand mal seizures and of course, guess when she goes into a seizure... while we are driving along highway 20. So I pull the big van over and her tech gets her out of her childseat and lays her out so she can bend and move as needed. Someone else is timing it and I call into let the center know what's happening. Well the other 4 cars in our caravan have pulled over too. And a couple of the techs run up to see what's happening.
The child's seizure ends and she recovers and we are able to get everyone buckled back in and we start to pull back out. All five of our cars merging back onto Highway 20. And then I check the rear view mirror, and guess what is coming across the emergency pull out in the middle of the highway. A police vehicle with lights flashing!
And we realize that it's probably not a good idea to drive away from him. So I pull back over, the mini van behind me pulls over and the 3 cars behind us.
And the cop gets out and walks up to the last car in our caravan, which apparently the drivers window doesn't open, because we then see the drivers door opening and they talk. The officer walks back to his car and we all pull out again.
But isn't this a funny explaination to explain the only time I've ever got pulled over on the highway, not to mention the fact that it was in a company van. :D
And I probably have a million other stories from work, chasing 5 yr olds up the lanes of bowling alleys or trying to push a slow bowling ball up a lane with my bare foot and end up actually kicking it... yeah that hurt... or the reaction of my client with Cerebral Palsy on his first experience playing with shaving cream, and rubs his nose, and ends up getting the stuff in his mouth and just starts to howl because it's so gross, and just keeps rubbing more on his face. And I was trying so hard to not laugh!
This has definately been a life changing job. I've loved coming back each summer and seeing how each of the kids has grown and improved. Because working with them everyday it can be hard sometimes to see the progress, but to leave and come back, you can compare where they were with where they were now. Some of the kids still may seem like little terrors now to some people that just met them.. and I say that with all of the love I have for them... but in comparision to where they were a year ago, or 5 yrs ago, it's like night and day, they have truely become angels at least in comparison to they're former selves.
I love the kids, but I definately have to admit that thanks to my experiences here, I know that there is no way (if I can help it) that I will get pregnant the first year of marriage. I've already cleaned up my own share of throw up and bloodied knees. I would prefer to send them home at the end of the day, at least for now. And hopefully whoever I marry will have plenty of nieces and nephews that we can spoil... and I can continue to enjoy my cousins kids too.
Well, it's getting late. Maybe I'll try to add more tomorrow, but I better get to bed.
One day I asked my client how she got her hair so cute and curly and she starts talking about
something completely off topic about what her brother did.
And so we have music time at work, and so we sing songs like I'm a nut... traditionally not the girls camp version, but it depends on if we have people at work that remember the non camp version. But you can also tell that a couple of the little girls mothers are camp leaders cause they are singing the girls camp version :D
We also sing Mary had a little lamb, Do your Ears Hang Low, a song about a pirate ship etc.
Well there's nothing funnier than when you walk away and you have one of these children songs stuck in your own head than to hear to the same tune as the one stuck in your head, such as Mary had a Little Lamb, to hear a little girl start to sing "Mary had a little Jam, whose's lease was white with snow... or something about as random.
Or another client who'd be sitting there writing and then all of a sudden you hear "I went down, down, down to that burning ring of fire..." Coming out of the mouth of a six year old boy. It's hilarious!
Or the fact that you can peg what kind of personalities these kids have now at 3 to 7 yrs old. We have a drama queen and a social butterfly, and one's that the born mother that makes sure that all of the kids are okay, especially if one gets a boo boo.
And then there are the crushes of 5 yr olds. It's so blately obvious. Whenever one walks into the room where the other one is they instantly move towards them. But unfortunately there's another girl at our center that has a crush on the guy too, but he likes the other girl, and well you can see the daggers flying... and they're only 5!
And one day I asked the little girl if she had a crush on the boy after she says something about him walking past the door of the room, and she blushes, so totally cute, and she starts to smile, and sweetly and I'm sure you know the -I swear I'm telling the truth voice--- she says "NO!"
And about 5 seconds later, the boy comes into the room and asks her to play. And she beams! And I think, yeah girl, you don't like him at all. And sadly as girls we never change, we still blush and act innocent and swear that "no way we wouldn't like him", but secretly cheer everytime we're near the guy.
And then there's the kids who you tell them not to do something, but you can tell they still want to do it anyway. So they look at you, and they back up into whatever they wanted, or they wait until you look away and then they make a quick move for something. Thinking that you're going to forget that you just told them no or that if they still keep eyecontact with you that you won't see what they're doing.
And they're just so innocent I have to laugh. And I know someday they're going to be looking at little kids themselves going, oh why can't life be like that for me now.
It's memories like these that keep me coming back to TLC.
It's strange that tomorrow is the last day of my 6th summer working for TLC. ... which basically means that I started there originally in June 2004.
But I have a lot of fond memories.
Like my first client ever, a month or so into the summer we worked on spelling his name. So I just started repeating it to him and having him say it after me, kinda sing-songy and by the end of the day he had totally memorized it. We were still working on the rest of the letters of the alphabet, but he completely knew the letters in his name.
Or still that same summer, I had a client that seemed perfectly fine one day, until we were walking into the restroom for him to do the obvious so that we could go on community, and then all of a sudden, puke explodes out of his mouth, thankfully, after we had reached the tiled floor of the bathroom. And it takes me a couple of seconds to process what's just happened, and then unlike what I figured my initial response would be ( like throwing up myself) I just send the kid to a toilet and tell him to stay there. I get someone to help my client up to the couch and then I start in on cleaning up the up chuck.
Okay, don't ask why but I for some reason another of my favorite memories involves another case of upchuck.
So we were driving up to the Splash Park for community a year or so ago, and we are like between Ucon and Rigby and I'm driving a very crowded 15 passenger van, and all of a sudden I hear a gagging sound. And an "Uh-oh." And a yell for a garbage bag or something. Which of course we didn't have. So the child's tech grabbed the next best thing. The kids backpack complete with towel... And so they are also yelling for us to pull over so the kid can get out and walk and puke again outside if needed. And low and behold it's right by the County Line Road exit. That actually has a canal running right off a parking lot next to the road. Talk about good timing. So they get the kid out and he breathes some fresh air and someone else grabs his backpack and heads down to the canal where they commence to wash out the backpack and towel. And inside we find a green changing pad and stick it on the kids seat and we call for another van to meet us at the Splash park in Rexburg and take the kid back. And once we get to Rexburg I head over to my apartment to get some cleaning supplies to sanitize the seat and try to make it somewhat breathable in the van for the ride back. --- There's not a whole lot of airflow in those big vans.
And then there's this year's trip to the Splash Park.
Well this time I was driving the big white 15 passenger van, we have another mini van with kids behind us and a car with techs driving behind the vans, and a couple of cars with IBI therapists and their clients. And we're in this caravan of sorts because the company likes us to stick together incause someone breaks down on the longer trip to Rexburg.
Well we have an adorable little girl that's one of our clients that gets grand mal seizures and of course, guess when she goes into a seizure... while we are driving along highway 20. So I pull the big van over and her tech gets her out of her childseat and lays her out so she can bend and move as needed. Someone else is timing it and I call into let the center know what's happening. Well the other 4 cars in our caravan have pulled over too. And a couple of the techs run up to see what's happening.
The child's seizure ends and she recovers and we are able to get everyone buckled back in and we start to pull back out. All five of our cars merging back onto Highway 20. And then I check the rear view mirror, and guess what is coming across the emergency pull out in the middle of the highway. A police vehicle with lights flashing!
And we realize that it's probably not a good idea to drive away from him. So I pull back over, the mini van behind me pulls over and the 3 cars behind us.
And the cop gets out and walks up to the last car in our caravan, which apparently the drivers window doesn't open, because we then see the drivers door opening and they talk. The officer walks back to his car and we all pull out again.
But isn't this a funny explaination to explain the only time I've ever got pulled over on the highway, not to mention the fact that it was in a company van. :D
And I probably have a million other stories from work, chasing 5 yr olds up the lanes of bowling alleys or trying to push a slow bowling ball up a lane with my bare foot and end up actually kicking it... yeah that hurt... or the reaction of my client with Cerebral Palsy on his first experience playing with shaving cream, and rubs his nose, and ends up getting the stuff in his mouth and just starts to howl because it's so gross, and just keeps rubbing more on his face. And I was trying so hard to not laugh!
This has definately been a life changing job. I've loved coming back each summer and seeing how each of the kids has grown and improved. Because working with them everyday it can be hard sometimes to see the progress, but to leave and come back, you can compare where they were with where they were now. Some of the kids still may seem like little terrors now to some people that just met them.. and I say that with all of the love I have for them... but in comparision to where they were a year ago, or 5 yrs ago, it's like night and day, they have truely become angels at least in comparison to they're former selves.
I love the kids, but I definately have to admit that thanks to my experiences here, I know that there is no way (if I can help it) that I will get pregnant the first year of marriage. I've already cleaned up my own share of throw up and bloodied knees. I would prefer to send them home at the end of the day, at least for now. And hopefully whoever I marry will have plenty of nieces and nephews that we can spoil... and I can continue to enjoy my cousins kids too.
Well, it's getting late. Maybe I'll try to add more tomorrow, but I better get to bed.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
The "To Be Continued...." Point
(Warning: This blog will probably be a little bit long winded and may include a couple of tangents in conversation... get used to it.... have I ever had a conversation stay on one topic ever..... and I'm really not joking! But today its easier for me to write out all this that's been bugging me, and it's easier than trying to put it into logical sentences over a phone or in conversations)
So after 22 years I have finally realized something about myself... sadly because of the lack of this thing I thrive on. I am kinda a control hog when it comes to my life. ... OK not Kinda... I am. I don't like other people making decisions for me and I really hate not knowing what's going to happen.
I'm not a red personality. I don't want to be the person in charge. My major color is Blue I want things organized and ready. And I hate it when things aren't planned and ready...
Now I enjoy random adventures and stuff, but ultimately I want to know that I will have a place to sleep at night and approximately when I'll get to a place and when I'll leave and I like planning beforehand what I might want to do. I may procrastinate deciding what I'll ultimately end up doing but I want to have a general idea.
And you're probably thinking... ok... yeah so you like control.... big deal why are you writing about it? Well here's why..... Cause I like to plan, and to know what's coming up... (you should see my schedule when I'm in school... it's all in writing) I think I may have taken after Mom on this. But anyway as I approach the end of my education... I'm beginning to mentally FREAK out a little.. okay a LOT!!!!
Basically the last 22 yrs of my life I've always know what came next and usually it had something to do with my education. I went to Joy School and Preschool and Kindergarten and then all the way up through the 13 yrs of public education.
And then I've gone through 4 full years of college, and here I am entering my LAST semester in Rexburg and I'm getting ready for student teaching to complete my fifth year.
It's pretty easy to be confident with what to do when there's basically another step to reach another thing to master. But now I'm reaching the end of my current educational path.
And I've finally made up my mind about both Fall semester and my student teaching semester starting in January. At least about where I want to live... but now again my need for control is starting to flare up minorly concerning fall semester.
I know where I want to live, but I'm not planning on living with anyone I already know, so I'm extremely anxious to get an email telling me who I'm going to be living with! And it was supposed to be here like the beginning of this week and a day or so ago I got an email saying that the roommie lists could possibly take another week!!! And I'm starting to stress... The longer I have to wait the more I worry about having 5 freshman roommates or moldy dishes hanging out in the sink and a table buried under stacks of roommates crap.
Which really aren't things that I can control. But I just want to know who so I can accept the worst if it is freshman or at least stalk them on facebook. :D
But I'm still excited to be done in Rexburg.... and to be able to move on to a new time in my life.
And I'm excited to go to Mesa, Arizona. It feels like it's where I'm supposed to be.
But I'm a worry wart and a what ifer... and I'm worried I might not really like it. I've never had to control a whole class by myself ALL DAY. And I'm sure I can do it. And I'm sure I'm going to make a fabulous teacher, but there's always those what ifs.
What's really trying my patience and causing a massive flare in my need to control is actually the fact that I have absolutely NO CLUE what I'm going to do after I walk across the stage to receive my diploma in April. Until I finish student teaching and answer some of my what ifs I can't make up my mind about what I want to do.
I know I don't want to spend the rest of my life in my parents' basement, but I don't know where I want to go, and some days I don't even know for sure that I want to teach. I've thought about going on to graduate school, but I'm actually thinking about Occupational Therapy if I go, or there's always teaching or I may think about becoming an IBI therapist for the company I currently work for if I stick around here.... It's extremely nice pay :D.... and I've also thought about working for a few months and then going on a mission.
And like I want to get out of Idaho Falls, and Rexburg for a while and try it on my own for a while. But I really don't know where... and some days I even wonder if I'll be able to handle it even. Yeah I moved away for college... but come on... I moved less than 30 miles to Rexburg. I probably see my family more when I'm away at school on the weekends at family stuff than I do when I'm living at home and working.
And so my 3mos in Mesa are going to kinda be my starting ground to see what I really want to do. Sometimes I hope I get offered a teaching job down there, or maybe meet some graduate student at ASU or some guy working down there and fall madly in love and have a reason to stay. But there's also the thought that I may get down there and decide that I don't like teaching. or that I never want to leave Idaho again. So I really don't know right now.
I just feel like I'm spinning my tires right now. I'm ready for the final lap of the race of college, but I don't know where I'm going to place in the race until I actually start moving again.
This summer I'm working at TLC for the 6th summer straight and I've been in the same singles branch since I graduated. And as of fall I'll have lived in Rexburg 10 semesters.
And I'm ready for change, I need something different. I'm just scared of the what ifs, and I'm afraid that what I've dreamed is exactly that just a dream.
I just don't KNOW! and I know this is probably just Heavenly Father's way of teaching me patience, but I just really wish I could have an idea of what I should plan on doing after I graduate.
I really want the control of being able to say "Yeah I plan to ______, in ________ after I graduate." But I honestly can't. There are to many variables, what ifs and maybes.... and it's driving this control freak nutty! I feel like my life right now is basically at the cliff hanger of a season finale... the "To Be Continued..." point and well the script is still being written for the next season, so there's a ton of loose ends still waiting to decide what's going to continue on to the next season and what's just going to get written out. And the next season will basically be determined by the end results of the last few seconds of the season finale. And I guess for me that season finale cliffhanger is student teaching.... I'm hoping after that's done I'll have an impression of what I'm going to be doing beyond the cliffhanger.
So after 22 years I have finally realized something about myself... sadly because of the lack of this thing I thrive on. I am kinda a control hog when it comes to my life. ... OK not Kinda... I am. I don't like other people making decisions for me and I really hate not knowing what's going to happen.
I'm not a red personality. I don't want to be the person in charge. My major color is Blue I want things organized and ready. And I hate it when things aren't planned and ready...
Now I enjoy random adventures and stuff, but ultimately I want to know that I will have a place to sleep at night and approximately when I'll get to a place and when I'll leave and I like planning beforehand what I might want to do. I may procrastinate deciding what I'll ultimately end up doing but I want to have a general idea.
And you're probably thinking... ok... yeah so you like control.... big deal why are you writing about it? Well here's why..... Cause I like to plan, and to know what's coming up... (you should see my schedule when I'm in school... it's all in writing) I think I may have taken after Mom on this. But anyway as I approach the end of my education... I'm beginning to mentally FREAK out a little.. okay a LOT!!!!
Basically the last 22 yrs of my life I've always know what came next and usually it had something to do with my education. I went to Joy School and Preschool and Kindergarten and then all the way up through the 13 yrs of public education.
And then I've gone through 4 full years of college, and here I am entering my LAST semester in Rexburg and I'm getting ready for student teaching to complete my fifth year.
It's pretty easy to be confident with what to do when there's basically another step to reach another thing to master. But now I'm reaching the end of my current educational path.
And I've finally made up my mind about both Fall semester and my student teaching semester starting in January. At least about where I want to live... but now again my need for control is starting to flare up minorly concerning fall semester.
I know where I want to live, but I'm not planning on living with anyone I already know, so I'm extremely anxious to get an email telling me who I'm going to be living with! And it was supposed to be here like the beginning of this week and a day or so ago I got an email saying that the roommie lists could possibly take another week!!! And I'm starting to stress... The longer I have to wait the more I worry about having 5 freshman roommates or moldy dishes hanging out in the sink and a table buried under stacks of roommates crap.
Which really aren't things that I can control. But I just want to know who so I can accept the worst if it is freshman or at least stalk them on facebook. :D
But I'm still excited to be done in Rexburg.... and to be able to move on to a new time in my life.
And I'm excited to go to Mesa, Arizona. It feels like it's where I'm supposed to be.
But I'm a worry wart and a what ifer... and I'm worried I might not really like it. I've never had to control a whole class by myself ALL DAY. And I'm sure I can do it. And I'm sure I'm going to make a fabulous teacher, but there's always those what ifs.
What's really trying my patience and causing a massive flare in my need to control is actually the fact that I have absolutely NO CLUE what I'm going to do after I walk across the stage to receive my diploma in April. Until I finish student teaching and answer some of my what ifs I can't make up my mind about what I want to do.
I know I don't want to spend the rest of my life in my parents' basement, but I don't know where I want to go, and some days I don't even know for sure that I want to teach. I've thought about going on to graduate school, but I'm actually thinking about Occupational Therapy if I go, or there's always teaching or I may think about becoming an IBI therapist for the company I currently work for if I stick around here.... It's extremely nice pay :D.... and I've also thought about working for a few months and then going on a mission.
And like I want to get out of Idaho Falls, and Rexburg for a while and try it on my own for a while. But I really don't know where... and some days I even wonder if I'll be able to handle it even. Yeah I moved away for college... but come on... I moved less than 30 miles to Rexburg. I probably see my family more when I'm away at school on the weekends at family stuff than I do when I'm living at home and working.
And so my 3mos in Mesa are going to kinda be my starting ground to see what I really want to do. Sometimes I hope I get offered a teaching job down there, or maybe meet some graduate student at ASU or some guy working down there and fall madly in love and have a reason to stay. But there's also the thought that I may get down there and decide that I don't like teaching. or that I never want to leave Idaho again. So I really don't know right now.
I just feel like I'm spinning my tires right now. I'm ready for the final lap of the race of college, but I don't know where I'm going to place in the race until I actually start moving again.
This summer I'm working at TLC for the 6th summer straight and I've been in the same singles branch since I graduated. And as of fall I'll have lived in Rexburg 10 semesters.
And I'm ready for change, I need something different. I'm just scared of the what ifs, and I'm afraid that what I've dreamed is exactly that just a dream.
I just don't KNOW! and I know this is probably just Heavenly Father's way of teaching me patience, but I just really wish I could have an idea of what I should plan on doing after I graduate.
I really want the control of being able to say "Yeah I plan to ______, in ________ after I graduate." But I honestly can't. There are to many variables, what ifs and maybes.... and it's driving this control freak nutty! I feel like my life right now is basically at the cliff hanger of a season finale... the "To Be Continued..." point and well the script is still being written for the next season, so there's a ton of loose ends still waiting to decide what's going to continue on to the next season and what's just going to get written out. And the next season will basically be determined by the end results of the last few seconds of the season finale. And I guess for me that season finale cliffhanger is student teaching.... I'm hoping after that's done I'll have an impression of what I'm going to be doing beyond the cliffhanger.
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